My cousin from the maternal side is a school teacher in Coonoor and younger to me by 5 years. It’s been aeons since we ran into each other as my work was based in Delhi and she is in an idyllic paradise near Ooty. Only last month, I learnt Shobha was ailing from cancer and in poor health.
She was diagnosed breast cancer; undergoing treatment at the Adyar Cancer Institute, Chennai and on Chemotherapy every three weeks. She takes the overnight train from Coonoor arriving in Chennai by 6 in the morning and proceed to her brother-in-law’s place at Indranagar. After refreshments, she reports at the institute for treatments and returning back to Connoor by the last night train. Nobody at her school has been intimated instead Shobha attributes her frequent visits to Chennai to treating a severe back pain!!!!!
I was a tad jittery visiting her on my Chennai trip given the tragic circumstances. But the minute I saw her, my fears were laid to rest. She was full of positive energy and matter-of-fact about the treatment.
She said,” Ashok, initially I felt upset and was sunk in self-pity. The why-me-syndrome!!! But when I saw small children battling it out so gamely that their perseverance was infective. There is one 8 year old boy called Vivek and one after my heart. He has been in the hospital every Friday for the last 8 months and yet so playful and energetic. These kids teach us adults wonderful lessons in forbearance”.
She formed a support group and they now trade stories on managing side effects and the stresses of a body pounded by antibodies and sarcoma cells. In addition, they egged one another and share dietary details.
“The fear of cancer is greater than what damage it actually does. Ashok, there is an illiterate woman from North Arcot district and she has been surviving cancer for over twenty years. The first counsel for cancer patients is not to panic and don’t hanker for sympathy”.
Shobha is quite a character and only after the third dosage of injections did the family members know of her ailment. Her long curly hair plait got entangled and she couldn’t untie the plait. She left it for two days and it started to hurt her neck and back. So, what does she do? Hire a taxi and go to a salon for a complete head shave. On coming back, her parents and kids cried uncontrollably.
She has two kids, one boy studying in 3rd std and a girl in 1st std. They are too young to understand as to what is happening but the boy got some inkling and shaved off his hair too saying,” I am also offering my hair for your speedy recovery”. Her story to her kid is that she is offering the hair to God to get her neck and back well!!! The word ‘cancer’ in the house is taboo.
Her hubby works in the army and stationed at Arunachal Pradesh and that’s as far as it can get geographically. He helped her for the first chemotherapy and had to leave for the barracks after entrusting her to the relative’s care. In the meantime, he has requested for a transfer and arrange her treatment in a military hospital in Pune. As of now, the only solace is daily phone calls.
I have known Shobha since childhood but never imagined her to be such a tough nut.
As I walked out, she accompanied me to the door. She said,” the doctors emphasize more on positive thoughts and they make a difference between healing and rotting away. The body-mind science is now an accepted fact and most wise doctors insist on a healthy mental frame of the patient”.
As I struggled to take the car out of the parking lot, she waved me with a big smile.
I told my wife,” What a woman!!!”
We just couldn’t help ourselves adding her in our daily prayers and being in regular touch.
Something about being positive when on a cancer treatment holds true for life too, I mused
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